Let me say up front that my journey down the road of preparing for my son’s future, in the event of my untimely death, was wrought with trepidation. You see I’m one of those people that begin contemplating my own immortality each time I hear of a close family member who unfortunately, met an untimely death. As a single parent, it’s especially scary. I mean, who could possibly take care of my child in a manner in which I see fit. (Probably no one because I’m overbearing and too much sometimes, even for my own self)!

The journey of choosing a guardian seemed as familiar to me as the journey of choosing appropriate godparents for my son. There were plenty of times I forgot all about it and moved on to something else because seriously, who wants to think about leaving their child. I thought about my friends and family being in different stations of their life. Some have kids and husbands, others have kids and no husbands, others have no kids and no husbands, and then others are just a hot mess. But I digress.

I recently had the pleasure of viewing Alexis Martin Neely’s video clip entitled “Choosing Guardians for Your Kids,” from her website Wear Clean Underwear Book. Alexis mentioned that parents should appoint a temporary (interim) guardian who lives within 20 minutes of your home, to allow time for a permanent guardian to get to the children. I discussed Alexis’ advice with several of my friends and the biggest question raised regarding temporary guardianship was:

What if I don’t know someone I trust who lives within 20 minutes of me?

This is an important question. You see, for me, it wasn’t an option to move away from my family. I mean, it wasn’t an option. My family lives within a 1 mile radius of each other and it’s accepted that even moving to another borough will be unacceptable with my Grandmother, the matriarch of the family. Nevertheless, others do not have the same family pressure, so they’ve made the brave decision that I’m too chicken to do.

So my best advice is to find someone you trust who lives close by, with the mindset that this person will not be able to make any financial decisions for you or your child (unless you say so.) Consider your child’s classmate’s family, Sunday school teacher, or just a really nice neighbor. Also designate more than one temporary guardian, just in case the other predeceases you, moves or becomes unavailable for some other reason.